Mixed Emotions

This afternoon I am filled with mixed emotions. I had a scheduled test for baby today, and had pretty noticeable contractions last night, but the test showed only that...contractions. Owen is doing fantastic!! We had an ultrasound Wed (pics to come...gotta scan them) and he passed his tests at 100% and was about 5lbs 11oz. They checked me today and I am still 2cm, same effacement. I am pretty anxious and uncomfortable, not to mention in pain at times, and it looks like I will remain like this until active labor begins which could be days or even weeks. Good news is that Owen is doing so well- that is what is most important. However, I am pushing miserable at times! I want him to be born for obvious reasons, as well as because I am "over" being pregnant. At the same it's better for him to hang out in my belly for as long as he can. so, for my son who I already love more than I can explain, I will endure bed rest for another week or so, and the contractions and ongoing early phase of labor until 3 more weeks when we will induce if he hasn't come on his own. It's like I am so glad he is OK, but so ready to deliver (for selfish reasons). I am also full of emotion and cry in an instant at just about ANYTHING...that's normal right? I am nesting can't act on it (having to be off my feet really sucks!) I am reading a lot, including great new cookbooks I got for Christmas, but I am not allowed to be up cooking. Baker's birthday was yesterday and I felt so bad because I always cook him one of his favorite meals, but his year he had to prepare dinner. I did manage to get instant brownies in the oven. Oh well, this too shall pass. In the meantime, I will keep praying for more patience and thanking God as often as I can for all of the MANY blessing I have, especially Owen:)